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Air Canada to offer pleasant customer service for $35 fee

An Air Canada plane taxi’s on the runway of Pearson International Airport in Toronto, Ontario, Canada,


(VATICAN ENQUIRER) Air Canada has announced a new upgrade option for all passengers beginning July 1. For $35, the airline is offering what it calls an “enhanced customer service package.

CEO Calin Rovinescu is especially proud of this new option. “Once again, Air Canada has shown itself to be a leader in the airline industry. We are the first airline to offer our passengers the ability to purchase pleasant customer service.”

After listening to passengers, the airline discovered that many of them were unhappy with a decision made years ago to stop being polite and helpful and embrace the art of inconveniencing and annoying customers.

“It turns out that our decisions to make travel more unpleasant didn’t resonate with passengers the way we’d hoped,” added Rovinescu.

Passengers will be able to purchase the enhanced customer service package for $35 at the time of purchasing their ticket, or for $45 at the airport. The extended package, which covers dealing with the airline in the event of lost luggage, costs $50.


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Tips For Studying Overseas (Abroad)


To avoid homesickness while studying abroad, pack at least one close relative.

Here are The Onion’s tips for how to make the most of your college semester abroad:

  • Do some advance research to figure out which program is right for you. Europe is generally life-changing, whereas South America tends to be more eye-opening.
  • Before choosing, carefully consider those countries your friends say are most fun versus those your other friends say are most fun.
  • To avoid homesickness, pack at least one close relative.
  • Spend your first few days in a new country identifying local places to eat, shopping for groceries, and doing laundry so you can establish a monotonous routine from which you never branch out.
  • Keep family and friends apprised of your travels by maintaining a blog for the first three days of the semester.
  • Be prepared to have your worldview challenged by students who have come from schools all across the United States.
  • Getting involved with extracurriculars will help you make the most out of your time abroad. Ask local students when the next political uprising will be and how you can get involved.
  • Take time every day to be thankful for these experiences. You’ll be wedging them into conversations for years to come.


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