Connect with us


Canada’s Harper Says Only Queen Elizabeth Can Remove Him From Office

In the photo Harper cracks up the Queen.

In the photo Harper cracks up the Queen.

OTTAWA — A visibly riled Stephen Harper backtracked on the promise to resign graciously if he lost in last week’s election, telling CTV that he will “go out kicking and screaming” if anyone tries to take his title away.

“Will I resort to getting physical? If I have to — yes,” Harper snapped in response to a Canada AM reporter. Harper lost the elections to the Justin Trudeau’s Liberals on October 20.

“I remind you that I am the Prime Minister of Canada today and I will be the Prime Minister of Canada on October 20th…and October 21st…and October 22nd…etcetera, etcetera, etcetra. No matter the outcome of election.”

“Only Her Royal Majesty Queen Elizabeth II herself can strip me of my title.”

“Doesn’t anybody read my omnibus bills?”

Harper’s about-face comes after repeated statements that he would “be a gentleman” and clean out his office immediately if either Justin Trudeau’s Liberals or Thomas Mulcair’s NDP win more seats than the Conservatives. Harper now reneges on those promises and pointed out that he said he would give up his office but never said he would give up the title of Prime Minister.

“Protocol says that the incumbent Prime Minister is first in line to form a new government,” said a spokesperson for the Queen’s viceregal representative, Governor General of Canada David Johnston, following Harper’s outburst.

“But that discretion is left entirely up to the Governor General of Canada himself and the Queen does not interfere in the affairs of government.”

“And, quite frankly, Her Majesty finds Mr. Harper a bit of a blowhard.”

Leave your vote

Stomped Tomato is a curious satirical newspaper offering breaking news, political satire, comedy, investigative journalism, opinion and celebrity news. Tomate pisoteado.


Joe Biden Replaces Trump’s Infamous Diet Coke Button With A Freestyle Machine

STOMPED TOMATO – Of the many of President Joe Biden’s points of business on his first day was to Diet Coke button with a Freestyle machine.

Now former President Donald Trump became fascinated with the little red button sitting on his desk in the oval office. Whenever Trump pressed it, and a valet swiftly brought in a Diet Coke on a silver platter.

“Freestyle machines are genius. One of the very greatest inventions of our modern times,” Suzie on Twitter.

While many applauded Biden’s decision, some, however, feel the freestyle machines are terrible and the president should get a fountain machine.

It is not clear what happened to the box with the red button. But what of the valet?

Sources told ST that the valet is undergoing training to make the machine is always fully stocked with soda.


Leave your vote

Continue Reading


WHO congratulates Donald Trump for having carried out a coup without leaving home

While a lot of countries and international organizations condemned Wednesday’s riots in the United States Capitol, the Wordly Health Organization congratulated President Donald Trump for acting responsibly in the midst of a historic pandemic, for staging a coup from home.

Given the warnings of health authorities not to go out, Mr Trump decided maintain social distancing and stay at home to try to overturn the 2020 presidential elections.

“We are pleasantly surprised at  responsibility that Donald Trump took need to the stay at home measures by the WHO during the events on Capitol Hill on January 7, 2021,” said the organization in a statement.

In a statement of his own, Donald Trump said that he preferred to stay at home, “where I can see them from the comfort of my home, than to do it out there with who knows who”.

Leave your vote

Continue Reading


Mexico decided they WILL pay for the wall; Canada wants one too

After the events in Washington’s Capitol Hill, Mexico has decided that they WILL pay for the Trump wall, commonly referred to as “the wall”. And Canada wants one too.

For years Mexico has refused to be pressured by U.S. President Donald Trump to “write out a check” for the border wall, stating that it is a wall they don’t want or need. But that came to an end as the events unfolded in real time on Wednesday, January 7, 2021.

Mexico’s President, Andrés Manuel López Obrador (AMLO), said that given this week’s events in the United States and the pledge by president-elect Joe Biden to halt construction of the wall, now is the time to take action before it’s too late.

Asked as to how he intends to pay for the wall, AMLO explained it would most likely be jointly by the government and “private enterprise” and that Mexico would reimburse the United States for the about 30 miles (48 km) that has been built since 2017, with a plan to have the rest built in less than 60 days.

AMLO detailed that Mexican workers from “both sides” of the border would work around the clock on the wall project.

The President also emphasized that the purpose of the wall would change from one to keep Mexicans from crossing over to the U.S., but rather to keep protect Mexico from its neighbour.

Canada’s Prime Minister Justin Trudeau said on Thursday that he would be counting the friendship and cooperation with Mexico over a wide range of political, trade, social, environmental and security interests to get a wall built across the 8,891 kilometers (5,524 miles) terrestrial boundary with the United States.

Trudeau and AMLO are expected to start talks in the coming days.

Leave your vote

Continue Reading



Log In

Forgot password?

Forgot password?

Enter your account data and we will send you a link to reset your password.

Your password reset link appears to be invalid or expired.

Log in

Privacy Policy

Add to Collection

No Collections

Here you'll find all collections you've created before.