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Health

Scientific Study Reveals That Homosexuality Is Extremely Contagious

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Independent researcher CSOA, conducted a study of homosexuality and posted their surprising results over the weekend. According to their research, homosexuality is the single most contagious condition that exists on Earth.

The surprising findings by the CSOA showed that 100% of the homosexual adults who participated in the study, had some level of intimate contact with a member of the same sex. Joseph Tritha, who was the lead scientist in charge of the study, revealed that of the 100,000 gay adults who participated in the study, all had intercourse or extended levels of intimate kissing with members of the same sex. Based on those findings it is believed that homosexuality is passed through bodily fluids, including saliva, from infected parties.

Tritha stated, “of all the infectious conditions I have studied, this one is by far the most contagious. The Gay (the term used to identify the condition) is the most prevalent condition plaguing our society.”

“There is a 100% percent infection rate associated with this condition. Engaging in homosexual activity all but assures that you will catch The Gay,” he revealed.

The organization also conducted research on 100,000 heterosexual adults, and 100% of the subjects tested negative for The Gay.

The CSOA (Common Sense Organization of America) says to avoid catching “The Gay,” it is highly recommended that one refrain from having intimate relations with members of the same sex.

The condition has spread to every corner of the globe and there is no known cure, but theists believe the solution is to pray away The Gay. That particular method has shown no sign of promise, but theists remain hopeful that one day a cure will be found.

There is a one question survey to determine if you have contracted this condition.

Have you engaged in homosexual activity? If yes, you have The Gay.

Via Thenewsnerd.com

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Stomped Tomato is a curious satirical newspaper offering breaking news, political satire, comedy, investigative journalism, opinion and celebrity news. Tomate pisoteado.

Canada

Old man excited to walk around changeroom naked again

OSHAWA, ON – With gyms around the province reopening, local senior citizen Waylan Marshall is relieved to no longer have to resort to walking around the house naked.

https://www.thebeaverton.com/2020/08/old-man-excited-to-walk-around-changeroom-naked-again/

OSHAWA, ON – With gyms around the province reopening, local senior citizen Waylan Marshall is relieved to no longer have to resort to walking around the house naked.

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Entertainment

influencers complain because they no longer know what to live on

Influencers have again come out to complain because they are losing the shine of their luxurious lives, due to the coronavirus covid-19 pandemic, they can no longer travel, nor take photos of their food in public places or their famous selfies.

Influencers need to be helped.

Or something like that, is what some influencers wanted to say in a very interesting report from the BBC, and since we are very good vibes, we are going to summarize it completely.

But first, let’s see what the YosStop is doing in full quarantine:

Well, now it is really interesting …

A few days ago, some influencers of the greatest size (or something like that) in the world, have been complaining and complaining in the media because they can no longer leave their homes, and when they do leave, they do not generate videos or photos or content from which they all always do the same: what if the little trip, what if the coffee in Italy, what if the photo that everyone takes in France, etc, etc, etc.

 

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Ayer fui #Bowie para tiktok ????

A post shared by C͟͟I͟͟N͟͟T͟͟H͟͟Y͟͟A͟͟ (@lenguasdegato) on

This type of content is profitable, that is, with each photo and video that they generate, YouTube gives them some coin as well as the brands with which they come out dressed, made up or subtly thrown together.

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Health

Study Claims Women Abandon Feminism After Finding Meaningful Relationships With Men

Women who remain die-hard feminists well into adulthood are oftentimes the least desirable specimens, science now claims.

“The only relationships they have are often ones with other females who subscribe to the same strict ideologies, and serve as echo chambers for extremist thought. The stereotype of overweight, unattractive, bitter, resentful hags with a chip on their shoulder isn’t really too far from the truth,” said Sheila Baker, director of the Garrison Institute located in Langford, Mississippi.

“Women who quickly abandon feminism are just happier in the long run,” Harman told National Report. “Once they engage in a healthy relationship with a member of the opposite sex, 78% of women realize that they had been brainwashed via college campuses and social media. They’re ashamed of having associated with a mob of mentally-ill whiners and seek to distance themselves  from that lifestyle as much as possible.”

After graduating high school, Sheila Baker was accepted into at a well-known liberal college located in the Pacific Northwest, attended primarily by the offspring of affluent families. Even then, feminism was the social justice ’cause du jour’ amongst bleeding-heart upper class young adults with no worldly perspective or experience. “It’s true. I identified as a feminist in college,” Baker blushingly confessed. “It’s really rather embarrassing to admit now. I marched in the marches. I blogged with the best of them. I was full of entitlement and resentment towards what I thought at the time was the source of all the world’s ills: The Patriarchy. In particular, white males. The only real exposure I had to the less fortunate was through my textbooks. Instructors basically fanned the flames by telling us that all sources of oppression and strife within’ the world were due to privileged Caucasians.

You get a bunch of impressionable white kids together who are in a rebellious frame of mind and tell them that the families they grew up with are basically responsible for everything that is wrong with the world and I can guarantee the outcome is not going to be a healthy one.”

And the horror stories don’t stop there says Sheila, who claims she has heard thousands of stories which ring similarly to her own. And far too many of those tales result in permanent damage to the woman, her personal life, and familial relationships.

Barker went on to elaborate upon one particular instance in which a woman became so wrapped up in feminism that she was disowned by her family, eventually leading to her untimely demise at the hands of an intentional overdose.

“We’ll call this woman K.C. out of respect,” Sheila began. “We were close friends in college, and even by my own admittedly very liberal standards, she was quite extreme. Always talking about how men should be castrated and put in labor camps. She updated her social media with misandrist hate speech, and even went onto violently attack her younger brother when he accidentally misgendered one of her friends.

During this time K.C. intentionally gained 200 pounds in what she called her fight against beauty stereotypes. What was once a beautiful, attractive young girl had permanently mutilated herself with facial tattoos, piercings, and morbid obesity.”

Sheila Baker will be releasing her findings in an upcoming interview with OUT Magazine, as well as a 30 state tour to sign the accompanying book which goes into even more detail as to why young women fall into the treacherous trap of liberalism, and how to reclaim their lives from commie parasites, and other damaging ideologies which prey on a misguided desire to make the world a better place, all while paving the hell.

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